Chinese New Year ~ emo

Day 1

All Bong's family meet up at my grandma house ..
Everyone start giving angpao, and all my aunty asked me where is alex ..
That make me emo again..
Ya, how I wish he will be with me at my grandma house ..
How I wish we are still be together ..
How I wish he doesn't leave me ..
How I wish all of this was just a dream ..
I wanted to wake up of this dream, and back to his side ...
How I wish ...

Feel crying but I can't, just can smile in front all of them and act like I'm ok...

My mum asked me do I wanna go langkawi or not ..
I don't want to go , if go surei will be emo ..
All the memory, was so clearly and keep in my mind ..

I msg him and wish him happy new year ..
He din reply me at all ..
I wish I can read his mind .. What is he thinking now ?
Will he find me back ? Will he still think of the all the memory ?

All are a unknown answer ..

At night me and my cousins went to clubbing, the first time clubbing without him ..
Again, e memory flash back ... When the first time went club wit him ..
The second time went club with him when his birthday and what he told me ...

Day 2

Today me and family went to my mum's family house ..
Same, everyone asked where is my bf again ..
Same, emo again ..

At night, me and all cousins went to chiong k ...
They sang those song he sang before ...
Again, I think back all the song he sang, all the memory we been together, go through together ..

My cousin talk to me about him ..
He scolded me ...
He counsel me ..
But still be the same..
I just can't forget him ...

Day 3

Today I really really think of find him..
But I don't know how to start a conversation ..
I don't know will he reply me or not ..
I don knw will he feel I'm annoying or not ..
The feeling was me and him was a stranger ..
The distance between us getting far and far away ..
Still can't imagine, we was been so close to each other before ..
How come everything will be like that so sudden ?

I Miss him so so so much ..
The first time I didn't enjoy my Chinese new year celebration ...