Tired

After the previous post, the whole week i was quite happy because i put all my heart and energy through the preparation of valentine's present for him ~

Monday i saw his friend and have a short chat ~
his friend told me that i have chance that maybe we will be back together ~
why ? he said that day when i chat with Alex in the phone, actually he was beside him
he said, after we finish chat, Alex look emo and keep thinking of me the whole night ~ even the whole night he din sleep ~

at first i heard all of this i was very happy and feel excited that what is his response after see the present ~
but through the following day, it seem like totally different compare to what his friend told me ~

i though he saw the present on valentine's day, wanted to ask him hw is it ?
but he didn't answer my phone ~
he also didn't reply my msg ~
until yesterday only i knw he haven receive the thingii ~

the other thing was ~
his friend planned to go club on this saturday ~
they asked me to go ~
but at last they said din go dy ~ because Alex tell them don ask me go ~
what does it mean ? is tat rejected again ?
what is in his mind exactly ? i don knw ~

today my friend told me that yesterday he went to college ~
but when he meet my friend, the first thing he said was " rachel at here ? if she's here, i eave first . "
what does he really mean to that ?
is that break up already we cant be friend anymore ?

This time u do really hurt me ~
After i heard that, straight away i cry ~
i went back home, even cry until going to faint ~
do he really care ? no ~ what he also don knw ~
 Im tired ~ tired in being so stupid ~
i had did what i should and shouldn't ~
but hat i get ? i get nothing ~

yes, you had win ~
you win my tears ~
infinity of tears ~

i had tired that i give so much of my care and love to you ~

Bless me *